i possibly should’ve started this tag with you. or maybe Natasha. you were both beloved pets, and you both left us sooner than we would have liked.

i wish i had more pictures of you. i remember your were a handsome boy, a silver tabby. but the only picture i have of you is out of focus. it stays on the altar with the rest of our beloved dead.

i don’t remember most of our time together. i remember when you were a kitten and would climb the ladder to my bunk. i remember your Christmas mouse, but only because the story keeps getting told. i remember that when we moved to 10th, you would sleep in the pillow i sat on in the garage. i remember you liked to clean my head, and would hold me in place to do so. i remember that when you caught rodents, you’d put them in your food dish (or play catch with them until they landed out of reach, like where mom and dad would put their keys on the shelf by the door). i remember you kept trying to get a crow because they teased you, and you finally did get one.

i know that you weren’t with us long while we lived on 243rd. you disappeared one day into the brush, and i never saw you again. Gana did, once, but when i came out, you were gone again.

you left without any warning. we searched the shelters. we put up flyers. but we never found you. i was devastated. you’d been my companion for almost a decade, then you were gone. i didn’t think i would ever love a cat as much as i loved you. i don’t know if i ever have, because i know that love can’t really be measured like that. i’ve loved each of the cats that have been “mine,” but i’ve loved them all in different ways.

Stormy did well after you left. she helped pass on your hunting knowledge to Kaneda and Tetsuo. she found the fattest mouse and crippled it to help them learn. they were a little young for the lesson, and were far more interested in the flies circling the kitchen. Tetsuo became a mighty hunter, though, bringing us all manner of prey.

you were my strong, handsome hunter. my first cat. the first cat that claimed me. as long as i have some memories, i think it’ll be okay.

i wish we’d had more time together. i wish that digital cameras/camera phones were a thing when we had you. because all i have left of you is a blurry picture and my memories.

i miss you. i don’t feel you around much anymore, but i miss you still. you would’ve liked it here. there’s plenty of hunting, good sun spots, very few crows to taunt you. i bet you would’ve loved the faerie rock. i wonder what you would’ve thought of deer, or rabbits. the neighbours have some livestock. would you terrorize their chickens or the goats? of course, if you’d made it here, you would’ve been a senior cat, in your twilight years. maybe your hunting days would’ve been behind you, and you’d have been content to stay inside all the time. there’s no way to know for sure, but i think about it sometimes.

i’m a much different person than i was when you had me. i wonder if you’d know me if you came back into my life in a different body. i hope so. i hope you’d still want me as your person, still want to sleep near me.

i hope that someday, i’ll find you again.

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